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May 2007

Extreme cyberbullying: Advice from NetSafe in New Zealand

NetSafe is New Zealand's premier online-safety organization. Below is the kind of information NetSafe provides parents seeking help concerning cyberbullying.

What is Cyberbullying?

Cyberbullying is diverse in the forms it can take. It can include (but is not limited to): text bullying; harassment and bullying on social-networking websites; bullying via digital images; harassment through identity theft; online ostracism; and phishing/entrapment of sensitive information online. As new technologies emerge, so do new ways to victimise others online. Cyberbullying happens to adults, as well as younger people, and can occur in a variety of relational contexts (e.g., school violence, domestic violence, workplace harassment, etc.). NetSafe runs a national Text Bully helpline (0508 NETSAFE) and receives approx 750 calls a year (45% from adults and 55% from children) who have experienced text bullying. A third of the calls are so serious that callers are advised to call the police.

Why is it so distressing?

Because of its ability to be...

• A 24/7 problem - messages can be sent and retrieved anytime of the day or night
• Easy for the bully - in terms of the scale of the bullying, disassociation from the effects of the bullying, and overall convenience,
• Not noticed by others - there may be no or little physical or verbal contact with the target,
• Hard to delete - Abusive material online can be left there a long time for others to find - employers, friends, family or people who use cyberspace to identify future targets of cyberbullying or grooming.

Advice

1. Support and assistance

   When someone has experienced a loss, or their trust has been abused, it is vital that they have access to some kind of support mechanism. Online loss or betrayal is no different because young people regard their online relationships and communications as just as important as their offline. Sometimes family and friends are able to provide support, and sometimes the person may find talking to a counsellor helpful. Counsellors have specific skills to assist people in coming to terms with events; they are independent and operate with total confidentiality. It's important to consider the needs/wants of the victim, and to realise that everyone has their own pace for healing. Grieving is a process, and while different people experience that process in different ways, it is quite normal, and likely, for it to take some time. Knowing that the support is there when they are ready can be a relief for people in such situations. Seeing a loved one go through something like this can be difficult, and it is equally important to ensure that parents, caregivers, and those closely involved with the young person also access support in order to better support the young person.

2. School intervention

   Schools have a responsibility to provide a safe learning environment (physically and emotionally) for all of their students. If something occurs outside of school, e.g., bullying, but impacts on the school life of the person being bullied, e.g., if the victim and the bully both attend the same school, or the bully is nearby and they may cross paths, or the bully is sending texts during school hours, the school's responsibility still stands. If they are both at the same school, we would recommend talking to the principal about what methods the school may have for making sure that the person being bullied is as safe as possible at school. It's important that the victim has a say in this process as well, as they may not be comfortable with some of the options the school suggests. NetSafe in New Zealand has a School Sector Manager, Richard Beach, who is experienced in dealing with and assisting school management in situations like this. If you would like to talk to him before approaching a school, please contact us on 0508 NETSAFE (0508 638723), or email NetSafe (queries@netsafe.org.nz) with your phone number, and we can arrange for him to contact you. Depending on the perspective of the person being bullied, the school guidance counsellor may also be able to assist. The school may need to look at a larger programme of educating and discussing cybersafety and some of the different risks online with students, like bullying, harassment and manipulation. This could be a way to assist others who could be caught in similar situations.

3. Police assistance

   All schools in New Zealand are affiliated with one or more YES (Youth Education Services) Officers. These are police officers specially trained in the area of youth issues, and can be great to talk to in serious situations involving youth. You can ask the principal of the school involved, or contact your local police station to obtain details of the YES Officer for that school. If victims are receiving threats of harm to themselves, or their property, family, friends or even pets, we recommend that the message be kept and a police complaint is made.

4. The media and suicide

   Media guidelines on suicide reporting have little effect on user-generated sites such as social-networking sites, blogs, forums, chat rooms, etc. While the freedom of the Internet allows for many positive outcomes and creativity, it can also be used in anti-social ways. Because of this, it is important that young people know that they can talk openly about anything they encounter online which they may find confusing or upsetting. Our free phone helpline (0508 NETSAFE) is called by many young people who want to talk about online problems. We make referrals to appropriate agencies where necessary, as we ourselves are not a counselling service. It's also important that they know about many other means of support which are available to them.

5. Dealing with the 'bully'

   It is normal for people who have experienced an abuse of trust, and for those who care about such people, to feel victimised and want the offending person to be 'brought to task' in some way. Many people who have experienced an abuse of trust do express a desire for 'justice' to address the hurt they have endured - and yet are also able to advance their own healing by getting professional support and doing something to prevent it happening again (like raising awareness around the issue). Unfortunately, while the offending material online can most often be taken down, achieving a sense of justice in these kinds of situations is not always possible. This does not always have to stop the healing process from getting under way. It may take quite some time for such people to recover from this experience, and making sure they are surrounded by supportive and understanding people can go a long way toward healing.

6. Social-networking sites

   Cases of cyberbullying and harassment have received a lot of publicity in NZ of late, and some have contributed to very difficult outcomes. While Bebo appears to be one of the most popular social-networking sites among young New Zealanders, at this point in time, it is important to realise that there are many other social networking sites. Most social networking sites (including Bebo), have terms and conditions that people must agree to in order to access the site. In our experience, Bebo has been quick to respond to complaints about material that breaches their terms, usually by removing the offensive comments or sometimes the entire page. When sending a complaint, it can be helpful to frame the complaint in terms of how it has breached the terms and conditions of the site in question, e.g., 'Clause 3.1 of your terms and conditions states that harassment is not acceptable behaviour, and page x includes the following example/s of harassment, [give example/s].' While it may seem like placing restrictions on social-networking sites would decrease the risk for young people, it is important to keep in mind that Bebo is a popular social-networking site at this point in time; if it were heavily restricted, or even shut down, another site would quickly take its place. If young people are blocked from a site at home or school they may find ways around any filters - or just use a computer in a different place, e.g., a friend's house or library. Along with educating young people about online risks,and being there for them if something bad happens, it's important for parents and caregivers to encourage all young people to act as good cyber-citizens, just as they would in the offline world.

You can find out more about dealing with cyberbullying on social networking websites by checking out this page in the Young Adult's section of the NetSafe Web site.

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